“Two friends, one pick, and a legendary journey through rock and roll – tune in for the laugh-out-loud adventure of Tenacious D!”
Watch the original version of Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny
_Prologue:_
Every city has its own rhythm, its own song to sing, but none more melodic than Venice Beach. The sun-drenched coast, the laissez-faire residents, the sound of waves clashing against the shore – all danced in perfect harmony. Amidst this symphony, a single note out of tune could spell disaster, or in this case, a hilarious adventure.
In the bustling heart of Venice Beach, innocent and somewhat clueless JB arrived, fresh from his Midwestern homeland, with dreams as big as the California sky, carrying the unyielding aspiration to make music that sung to people’s souls. Little did he know, his destiny was about to take an unexpected detour, written in the stars and sealed with the strum of a legendary guitar pick.
And so, our tale begins, a tale of two unlikely protagonists initiating an extraordinary journey driven by their passion for music, friendship, and comic mishaps. A tale of sounds, strings, and staggering endeavor. A tale that would see the birth of the world’s greatest band, Tenacious D.
_Chapter 1: Melody Mishaps_
JB’s introduction to Venice Beach was nothing short of a slapstick comedy. He was the quintessential Midwestern boy, lost in the city of dreams with wide eyes filled with bewildering innocence. His introduction to KG was equally unexpected. The beach slacker with a heart of gold and an untapped talent for music was initially indifferent to the Midwesterner.
“Why not create a band?” JB proposed one evening, as they sat overlooking the sun painting the ocean orange. KG, who considered music a hobby rather than a career, chuckled at the idea. However, something about JB’s relentless optimism and passion seeped into KG’s laid-back persona, and he found himself reluctantly agreeing.
As they strummed their guitars, their lack of musical cohesion was evident. JB’s fiery enthusiasm clashed with KG’s languid rhythm, each trying to outdo the other. The beach, their makeshift stage, was filled with sounds, but hardly what anyone would call music. However, amid the off-beats and discordant chords, there was an unspoken connection, a shared dream that bound them together.
The promised land of musical harmony seemed far away as JB consistently rushed the tempo, and KG forgetting the lyrics more often than not. However, failure after failure only emboldened their resolve. The duo dusted off their mistakes and found humor in their lack of synchronicity. Their shared laughter and mutual understanding fueled their journey from inept novices to a fledgling rock band, Tenacious D.
The Venice Beach residents, initially skeptical, found themselves drawn to the duo’s raw energy. There was something mesmerizing about the boys’ unwavering dedication, their willingness to face humiliation, and keep going despite the odds. The beachfront that once echoed with their discordant notes gradually hummed with anticipation for their performance.
In the heartland of Venice Beach, under the pastel hues of the setting sun, two individuals with nothing but their dreams and guitars began their musical journey. It was a journey filled with laughter, struggles, and the occasional off-tune melodies. With each strum of their guitar, each failed harmony, Tenacious D was gradually finding its rhythm. Amid the hilarity of their misadventures, a legend was slowly taking form. Neither KG nor JB knew what fate had in store for them, and the magical pick that was about to turn their world upside down.
And so, the saga of Tenacious D began, setting the stage for a journey brimming with laughter, music, and magical guitar picks.
Chapter 2: The Band of Brothers
The California sun began to dip beneath the horizon, casting long shadows along Venice Beach. JB, an earnest Midwesterner, strummed his guitar, his fingers clumsily trying to grasp the chords. Across him sat KG, the epitome of ease, plucking notes from his bass effortlessly, his eyes closed in concentration. Although the notes from their respective instruments were scattered and disjointed, there was an evident passion in their attempts. A passion, they hoped, would transform them into the world’s greatest rock band – Tenacious D.
Their practices, held under the excuse of a beachside picnic, often turned into episodes of hilarity and awkwardness. JB, in his enthusiasm, would often fumble and trip, sending sandwiches flying and knocking over soft drinks. KG, on the other hand, would calmly pick up his instrument and find a new spot, chuckling at JB’s clumsiness. Despite the initial discomfort and countless errors, the first seeds of companionship were sown.
As weeks turned into months, the beach became their sanctuary, a place where they could escape the monotony of their regular lives. Midwestern innocence and laid-back local wisdom mixed with the jarring chords of their practice sessions. As their fingers got accustomed to the frets, and their voices less shaky, their bond strengthened. The world might not have known Tenacious D yet, but Venice Beach was beginning to feel the force of their music.
However, forming a band was not without its tribulations. JB, with his perfectionist streak, often had a different vision than KG, who was more about going with the flow. Heated arguments over pairings of chords, lyrics, and the direction of their music often left them both frustrated. Despite the arguments, though, they both knew they were in this together. They were not just two random strangers anymore; they had become brothers in arms.
One evening, after an especially heated argument, JB walked off, leaving KG alone. As the sun set and the shadows of the palm trees danced on the sand, KG felt the void. He missed the sound of JB’s laughter, his absurd theories about music, and even his clumsiness. He realized that the magic of Tenacious D was not just in the music, but in their companionship.
The next day, JB found KG strumming a new melody at their usual spot. The tune was full of joy, absurdity, and a dash of clumsiness – a perfect representation of their bond. JB joined in, adding his rhythm to KG’s melody, resulting in a song that was truly Tenacious D. The frequent arguments and heated discussions turned into solid rock verses, each chord reflecting their friendship.
As they continued to create music, they learned to appreciate each other’s strengths and weaknesses. JB’s perfectionist nature drove them to strive for better, while KG’s laidback attitude reminded them to enjoy the process. Their contrasting personalities, which once seemed like a hurdle, became their strength, giving Tenacious D its unique flavor.
Yes, the path to becoming the world’s greatest band was laden with trials and tribulations. The journey was tough – it needed hard work, sacrifice, and plenty of mistakes. But JB and KG learned that to make great music, they needed more than just talent or a magical guitar pick. They needed each other.
And so, Tenacious D was born, not just as a band but as a brotherhood – a testament to their journey, their bond, and their shared love for music. Little did they know that their bond, their music, and their dream of greatness would soon take them on an adventure, an adventure of a lifetime, towards a magical guitar pick, located in a rock-and-roll museum some 300 miles away. But that is a story for another chapter. For now, Venice Beach lulled back into its rhythm, harboring the secret of the birth of the world’s next greatest band.
Chapter 3: The Whispers of the Pick
In the heart of Venice Beach, amidst the routine chaos, a mysterious tale emerged. One unusually warm afternoon in the local coffee shop, JB overheard a murmured conversation that instantly made him drop his muffin. Two strangers were talking about a magical guitar pick that resided in a rock-and-roll museum some 300 miles away. The legend was that the pick could transform any mediocre musician into a rock deity overnight. Once the strangers left, JB greedily gulped down the remnants of the conversation and the remaining crumbs of his muffin.
He rushed back to their garage-turned-rehearsal-space, fueled by the adrenaline of excitement and caffeine. He blurted out the whole tale to KG, hardly pausing to catch his breath. The skeptical KG raised his eyebrows, not fully buying into the idea of a magical guitar pick. But JB’s enthusiasm was contagious. Soon, the idea of this magical guitar pick, the solution to their dream of becoming the world’s greatest band, took root in his mind too.
Neither of them questioned the authenticity of the story—a magical guitar pick? Really? But they let their desperate desire for success overshadow the bizarre premise. They began to fantasize about how the pick would change their fate, help them produce music that would break all records, bring the world to its knees. Grand visions of sold-out concerts, screaming fans, platinum discs, and a place in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame danced in their heads.
The duo got obsessed with the idea of the pick. They spent hours on the internet, researching the museum and its security systems—a little too much time for KG’s liking. He started growing anxious about the potential risks involved, but JB was too consumed by the lure of the pick to care. He reassured KG that they were smart enough to pull it off, and if they did, they wouldn’t have to worry about anything anymore.
They visualized the journey they would have to undertake. The dusty highway, the eerie desert nights, long hours on the road, the fear of the unknown—all became part of the romanticism of their quest. But the highlight of their dream was the climactic heist. They imagined every possible scenario, from smooth and suave to rough and ready, each one more ludicrous than the previous. Though the practicality of their plan was questionable at best, they couldn’t help but be excited.
The idea of the heist brought with it a new wave of enthusiasm. The garage, once their sanctuary, transformed into a haven for peculiar heist planning. The days turned into nights and the nights into days as their plan began to take form. Between giggles, arguments, silly fights, and mentions of ‘Doing it for the D,’ they devised their grand, foolhardy scheme to steal the magical guitar pick.
Although their goal seemed farfetched and nearly impossible, the mere thought of accomplishing it was intoxicating. As absurd as it was, it gave them hope. It provided them with a purpose. It made them dream, bigger than ever before. The whispers of the magical guitar pick had not only captivated them but also set them free. The enormity of their upcoming adventure hung in the air around them, thick and tangible as a pre-storm stillness.
As the sun set and the Venice sky was baptized in hues of purple and gold, the duo sat amidst crumpled papers and empty coffee mugs. The weight of their decision sank in. Tomorrow, they would embark on the most significant adventure of their lives, armed with nothing but a haphazard plan, an unshakable friendship, and a burning desire to rock the world.
JB turned to KG, his eyes gleaming with anticipation, and said, “Bro, we’re going to steal the pick of destiny.” And so, began their legendary journey towards their dreams, towards their destiny.
Chapter 4 – The Plan
The sun was making its descent over Venice Beach as KG and JB convened in their shared, cluttered apartment. The air was thick with anticipation and the faint aroma of stale pizza. JB unfurled a large, outdated map across their coffee-stained table – their mission was about to take shape. A 300-mile journey stood between them and their ticket to superstardom, the magical guitar pick, shrouded with the aura of rock legends past.
They began to strategize their plan, their minds buzzing with equal parts excitement and fear. JB, the more level-headed of the two, proposed a logical approach: “We need a blueprint of the museum, KG. We can’t just barge in there without knowing the layout.” KG, ever the spontaneous spirit, was less enthusiastic about this cautious approach but he saw the wisdom in JB’s words.
And so, their quest to acquire the blueprint began, setting them on a trail of comedic misadventures. They posed as janitors, museum interns, even tried to sweet-talk their way through the security guard who was more interested in his sandwich than their blabbering.
Next, they needed to acquire specific skills that JB had seen in countless heist movies. Picking locks was challenging, with JB struggling to align the tiny pins while KG impatiently fiddled with the tension wrench. Despite numerous setbacks, the duo persevered, their shared ambition fueling their determination and their unfamiliarity with the task only adding to the comedic chaos.
Dodge rolling was another skill they deemed essential, imagining stylish escapes from laser security systems and guards. Little did they know, real-life dodge rolling involved less grace and more painful encounters with the floor. Their unorthodox training sessions became a source of laughter for the neighborhood kids, but for KG and JB, it was an amusing yet necessary part of their journey.
The plan was taking shape, their roadmap to fame and respect. However, a new problem arose, transportation. Neither JB nor KG owned a vehicle, and hitchhiking to the Rock and Roll Museum didn’t seem quite as grand as the mission they were about to undertake.
After a long debate and comical attempts at securing a ride including trading a guitar for a bike and convincing a local mechanic to lend them his scooter, they decided to borrow an old, disheveled van from a friend. Despite the van’s questionable reliability, the sight of their transportation filled them with a newfound surge of optimism.
One night, as the final details of their plan were falling into place, a sense of reality dawned on them. They were really going to steal the legendary pick. The very thought sent a rush of adrenaline through their veins. But underneath the thrill, there was a flicker of fear, the fear of the unknown. It was a surreal moment that united them, two friends standing on the precipice of what could either be their greatest triumph or their most spectacular downfall.
And so, amidst laughter, missteps, and shared dreams, the plan was ready. A moment of sober silence fell between them as they looked at each other, their expressions mirroring a mix of exhilaration, fear and sheer determination. This was it. Their ambitions, aspirations, and the essence of their bond were all encapsulated in this daring plan.
As the night welcomed the dawn, the duo looked out at the horizon, their hearts pounding in sync to a rhythm that felt like the beginning of their greatest rock ballad. The journey to steal the pick was no easy feat, but they were ready. It was time for Tenacious D to etch their names in the annals of rock history. The plan was set into motion.
Chapter 5: On the Road
The sun was only beginning to rise as KG and JB set off on the epic journey to the museum, their eyes full of dreams, their hearts pounding with the excitement of the adventure ahead. They had no car, no map, and only a vague idea of where they were going – but they were armed with an unwavering determination and a shared dream of rock stardom that was as vast as the sprawling Californian landscape. Their destination, the legendary museum, lay 300 miles north, and the magical pick nestled within it was the one thing that could transform their lives forever. But little did they know, a journey of hilarity and profound self-discovery awaited them.
As the sands of Venice Beach gradually gave way to the towering palms and sun-drenched boulevards, the duo made their way north, hitchhiking when possible, and trudging along merrily when not. The two misfit musicians, with their shared love for Led Zeppelin and the occasional fast food, quickly fell into the rhythm of the road. They kept themselves entertained during their journey with their infectious banter and impromptu jam sessions, their music echoing across the endless highways and under starlit skies.
One of the highlights of their journey came when they were picked up by a group of spirited senior citizens in a bright pink RV, who were on their way to a Beach Boys tribute concert. KG and JB, despite their initial hesitation, soon found themselves singing along to “Good Vibrations,” their voices layered with laughter and the unrestrained joy of the moment.
Their journey also had its share of unconventional encounters. A particularly memorable one was with a folk band of bearded lumberjacks deep within the Redwood forests. This led to an impromptu ‘rock vs folk’ music battle around the campfire, which ended in a draw and a heartwarming scene of unity through music.
However, the road didn’t always offer amusing encounters and carefree laughter. They faced their fair share of challenges as they navigated the unknown, from dodging suspicious highway cops to surviving countless nights under the stars with nothing but their rucksacks for pillows and their shared dreams for covers.
Yet, it was precisely these hardships that brought KG and JB even closer. When the asphalt turned rough, and the road ahead looked uncertain, they found solace in their shared resilience. When the cold seeped in, they found warmth in their shared humor. A deep understanding and respect for each other started to take root, strengthened by the trying circumstances they endured together.
By the time they reached the outskirts of the museum’s city, their friendship was stronger than ever, and their mission to steal the magical pick seemed more profound than merely a quest for fame. They were no longer just two common men sharing an uncommon dream; they had become the embodiment of their band name – Tenacious D.
As they neared their destination, under a sky ablaze with the colors of the setting sun, they reflected upon their journey. What had begun as an adventure for rock stardom had now turned into a journey of self-discovery and profound friendship. What lay ahead was unknown, but they were certain about the bond they had formed and the unshakeable faith they had in their shared vision – to be their own version of rock legends.
Chapter 5 concludes with KG and JB, standing at the precipice of their greatest adventure yet – entering the museum and stealing the pick of destiny. The road had taught them the true essence of their friendship and the lengths they were willing to go for their dreams. The journey had been long and arduous, but it was their burning passion for music and their unwavering tenacity that ultimately kept them going. They were more than ready to face whatever lay ahead. For they knew, they were in this together – for better, for worse, for the love of rock and roll.
Chapter 6: The Heist
The grand museum rested amid towering skyscrapers, encased in a cloak of silence that the darkness of night had provided, a stark contrast to the boisterous city around it. As the pale moonlight drenched the grand edifice, it radiated an intimidating aura. Armed with ill-gotten blueprints, a makeshift toolkit, and a resolve hardened by dreams of grandeur, JB and KG lurked in the shadows, their hearts pounding like drumbeats.
The duo, dressed in outfits that would make a hardened criminal snigger, tiptoed towards the back door. After weeks of rigorous training through countless YouTube tutorials, KG managed to pick the lock, surprising even himself. They slipped inside, their excitement escalating with every step into the eerie silence.
As they crept through the desolate hallways adorned with the memorabilia of rock legends, the scale of their undertaking finally sank in. The daunting enormity of the museum was an intimidating labyrinth, each turn leading them deeper into the belly of the beast. The exhibits of rock history gleamed with an uncanny glow under the dimmed lights, casting long creepy shadows, their presence mocking the audacity of the would-be thieves.
They finally reached the mantle that housed the magical pick. Enclosed in a glass case, it shimmered with an otherworldly glow, singing a song of power and allure. The sight of the pick sparked a glimmer of greed in their eyes, their hearts humming the melody of unearned fame.
But the alarm system was an unexpected beast. KG’s eyebrows knitted together in concentration as he tried to decode the web of lasers. Their inexperience was glaringly evident, their actions teetering on the edge of blunder and desperation.
Just when the tension was reaching its peak, KG slipped, triggering the alarm. The museum erupted in a cacophony of sirens and flashing lights. Panic washed over JB and KG as they grabbed the pick and dashed in a frenzy, laughter and terror intertwining in a delirious symphony.
Their escape was a comedy of errors. KG tripped over his shoelace, sprawling on the marble floor. JB, too busy looking over his shoulder, collided with a life-size model of Elvis, toppling it over. They dashed towards the exit, their laughter echoing down the empty corridors, their escape path punctuated with slapstick blunders.
In their desperate attempt to evade the security, they found themselves in a janitor’s closet. As the guards rushed past them, they barely managed to contain their laughter. In the ensuing chaos, Tenacious D made their escape, clutching the stolen pick, their hasty exit a testament to their luck rather than their planning.
The cool night air wrapped around them as they stumbled into the alley, the blaring sirens fading into the distance. The thrill of the heist was replaced by the absurdity of their actions, and they burst into uncontrollable laughter, clutching their sides. The hallowed pick was now in their possession, an instrument of their dreams, their ticket to stardom.
But little did they know, the resonance of the magical pick was about to change their lives. A storm was brewing on the horizon, and Tenacious D was about to face a whirlwind of fame, envy, and a test of their friendship. As they celebrated their success, they were oblivious to the curveball life was about to throw their way. Thus, ended the chapter of the heist, a prelude to the roller coaster ride they were about to embark on.
Chapter 7: The Pick’s Power
As soon as the magical pick rested in JB’s hand, an electric surge pulsated through him. KG and JB stood in awe of the instrument, feeling its incredible power. Soon, this power translated into their music. The melodies they crafted were unlike anything they had ever produced before. Their tunes held an addicting charm. People would stop and listen, becoming entranced by the enthralling combination of KG’s quick, rhythmic strumming and JB’s voice – deep, resonant, its every inflection magnified and glorified by the pick’s magic.
Venice Beach was taken over by the infectious and invigorating pulses of Tenacious D’s music. The band that had been an inconspicuous blip in the local music scene was now blossoming into a sensational phenomenon. With the magical pick, they were anything but regular. They were rock gods.
As their popularity skyrocketed, so too did the pressure. Their newfound status brought unforeseen challenges. The once humble band found themselves thrust into the chaotic and ruthless world of rock and roll fame. Recording contracts, groupies, and electrifying concerts became routine. The unity and simplicity of their early days in Venice were slowly being replaced by the glam and glitter of their new life.
While the duo reveled in their success, they also struggled to keep their friendship afloat. JB found his ego inflated with each concert’s roaring applause. The shy Midwesterner was now the flamboyant frontman of Venice Beach’s biggest sensation. On the other hand, KG, who once led an aimless life as a local slacker, faced his own demons. He felt overshadowed by JB’s charisma and grew envious and frustrated.
As the pick continued to amplify their fame and musical prowess, it also started draining their essence. The magical instrument summoned a unique melody from its wielders by leveraging their emotional energy. The more they played, the more they felt drained, which further strained their friendship and made them question their journey.
One day, an unforeseen whirlwind of events forced the duo to confront their feelings. They were challenged by a rival band seeking the magical pick’s power. The confrontation played out in front of an enthusiastic crowd, eagerly waiting for a musical showdown. The once united Tenacious D was now divided in spirit, their internal conflicts playing out on stage.
The rival band showcased their musical prowess, playing complex chords that filled the air with a sense of intimidation. KG stared at the crowd, his fingers trembling at the strings, and JB felt a lump forming in his throat. The weight of the magical pick felt like a ton in his hand.
In the cacophony of the rivals’ music and the crowd’s cheers, JB glanced at KG. He saw the same fear in his eyes that he was feeling. The man who had once been his friend, his partner, was now a stranger. The crowd’s cheers and the rival band’s music seemed to fade into the background as JB was met with an epiphany. Their pursuit of the pick had not brought them closer to their dream, but instead, it had torn them apart.
After the numbing realization, JB decided to lay down the pick. He signaled to KG who looked at him, startled. He could see a familiar spark in JB’s eyes. It was the same spark they had when they started on the sands of Venice Beach with nothing but a dream and a guitar.
In a surprising turn, Tenacious D, sans the magical pick, played their next song. Their music, though less enchanting, resonated with the raw passion they once held. The crowd, taken aback by the sudden shift in their music’s tone, slowly started to cheer.
While they did lose the duel, they won something more valuable – their friendship and the realization of what truly mattered.
The night ended with the magical pick being taken by the rival band. Yet, JB and KG did not feel defeated. They felt relieved. The burdensome glamour of rock stardom had been lifted off, replaced once again with the sheer love for music. They realized the pick was not the answer to their dreams of greatness. It lay within their shared passion and dedication, and in the unity that was Tenacious D.
Chapter 8: Return to Roots
Tenacious D’s victory lap was short-lived. As quickly as their fame had escalated, so had their problems. The magical pick, once perceived as a vessel of greatness, was gradually revealing itself to be an enigma wrapped in a conundrum. KG and JB were struggling, caught between the euphoria of their newfound celebrity status and the daunting challenges it invited.
“JB,” KG spoke up one day, “Do you remember why we started this band?”
“To rock the world,” JB replied without missing a beat. But KG could see the uncertainty in his partner’s eyes. The glamour of fame had begun to dim, leaving them in the proverbial twilight of their success.
Days turned into weeks, weeks into months. The duo was on a rollercoaster, the high peaks of their popularity often plunging into the deep valleys of myriad challenges. Their sense of self was spiraling down a vortex of confusion and disillusionment.
They were torn. The pick had given them everything they had ever wanted – fame, recognition, and an insatiable audience. But it had also exacerbated their fears, insecurities, and, most importantly, the threat to their friendship.
Would Tenacious D, their band, their dream, their friendship, really end up as a casualty in pursuit of fame?
One rainy afternoon, a particularly melancholic melody played on KG’s guitar. It stirred something in JB. The tune, raw and beautiful, was a stark contrast to the rock anthems they had been belting out lately. It reminded them of simpler days, back at Venice Beach, when they were just two friends with a shared love for music, unburdened by fame and fortune.
This moment, this melody, this feeling… It was everything Tenacious D stood for.
JB looked at KG, the unspoken words hanging heavy in the air, “We need to return the pick.”
And so, they embarked on another journey. This time, not in pursuit of greatness, but in an effort to salvage their original dream. The road back to the museum was significantly tougher than the one that brought them there. But the duo, resilient in their decision, faced these obstacles with untamed gusto and their trademark comedy.
Their journey was peppered with many comedic misadventures, from hitching a ride with an obsessed fanboy to an encounter with a group of seniors on a museum tour. Each hurdle, each delay, only strengthened their resolve. The pick, they realized, was not their ticket to being the world’s greatest band. It was their passion, their love for music, and their friendship.
The duo reached the museum and returned the pick to its right place. As they walked out, they felt a weight lift off their shoulders. They were back to being KG and JB, two friends who loved music more than anything else in the world.
Returning to Venice Beach felt like a homecoming. Their friends welcomed them back with open arms, and the sounds of music filled the air. They picked up their guitars, not for fame or fortune, but simply to play. The melody flowed effortlessly as they strummed, their fingers nimbly dancing on the strings.
No longer fettered by the pressure of the pick, their music pulsed with raw energy, honesty, and passion. It connected with people, not because of a magical pick or their rock star status, but because it was real.
In the end, Tenacious D didn’t need a magical pick to be great. The magic was in their friendship, their passion for music, and their ability to bring people together through their songs. Their journey reinforced a valuable lesson – True greatness wasn’t about fame, fortune, or magical picks. It was about staying true to yourself and your art, no matter what.
Their story was about a band, two friends, a magical pick, and the realization that their music didn’t need magic to touch people’s hearts. For KG and JB, this was just the start. The world was their stage, and they were ready to play – as Tenacious D, the band born out of a love for music and friendship.
In a world where dreams chase fame, Tenacious D stood tall, a testament to the true essence of music. Raw, real, and rooted in passion. Their story ended not with a grand climax but with a simple strum on their guitars, a symbol of their incredible journey from being obscure dreamers to realizing their true path – A path marked not by fame or fortune, but by the sheer love of music.
Some scenes from the movie Tenacious D in The Pick of Destiny written by A.I.
Scene 1
FADE IN:
EXT. VENICE BEACH – DAY
Pan across a bustling beach – surfers, sunbathers, artists. Focus in on a solitary figure staring out to sea – JB, innocent, wide-eyed midwesterner, out of place.
Suddenly, a guitar riff breaks out.
CUT TO:
KG, the local slacker, sitting against a palm tree, strumming away. JB is drawn to the sound, watching KG from a distance.
JB:
(awkward)
Nice tune… you composed it?
KG looks at JB, surprised and mildly annoyed by the interruption.
KG:
(sarcastic)
No, it just came to me by divine intervention.
JB laughs nervously and extends his hand for a handshake.
JB:
I am JB.
Kg gives a nonchalant nod and returns to his music.
CUT TO:
Various shots of the new friends playing music, arguing, laughing – growing closer.
NARRATOR:
(voice-over)
“Two men, one band. Born out of discord, shaped by struggles. This is the story of Tenacious D. And it’s just starting.”
FADE OUT:
TO BE CONTINUED…
FADE IN:
EXT. VENICE BEACH – NIGHT
JB is standing on the boardwalk, staring at the stars. KG walks up behind him.
KG:
(eager)
We should start a band.
JB turns to look at him, a slow smile spreading across his face.
FADE OUT.
TO BE CONTINUED…
Scene 2
FADE IN:
INT. VENICE BEACH GARAGE – DAY
A makeshift ”studio” cluttered with discarded pizza boxes and guitar picks. We see JB (early 30s, Midwestern charm) and KG (early 30s, a laid-back local) in the middle of a heated argument.
JB
(Desperate)
We need a set list, KG! We can’t just “go with the flow.”
KG
(Laughs)
Relax, man. It’s rock and roll. It’s meant to be wild!
JB
(Snaps)
It’s meant to be fun, KG, but we’re also meant to be good!
A moment of silence. KG picks up his guitar, starts playing a comical TUNE.
KG
(Sly smile)
How about this for our opening number?
JB
(Shakes his head)
We’re not a clown act, KG. We’re a rock band.
KG stops playing, stares at JB. The air grows tense. Suddenly, KG breaks into a GRIN.
KG
(Chuckles)
Alright, Mr. Serious. Show me what you got.
JB takes a deep breath, picks up his guitar, and starts STRUMMING. A beautiful MELODY fills the room. KG listens, genuinely impressed.
Suddenly, the music stops. JB looks at KG, quiet but hopeful.
JB
(Sincere)
Together, we can create something… magical.
KG
(Nods, smiling)
Yeah… Yeah, we can.
They lock eyes, a silent pact forming. This is the birth of Tenacious D.
FADE OUT://
Scene 3
FADE IN:
EXT. VENICE BEACH – DAY
We find JB and KG on the beach, playing music and trying to draw the crowd’s attention.
CUT TO:
EXT. COFFEE SHOP – DAY
JB and KG are at a local coffee shop. JB overhears a conversation from a nearby table where TWO MYSTERIOUS STRANGERS talk about a magical guitar pick.
MYSTERIOUS STRANGER 1
…and they say it’s incredibly powerful. It’s said to be at a museum some 300 miles away…
MYSTERIOUS STRANGER 2
That pick is not for the faint hearted. Itis said to have magical powers…
JB looks intrigued. He leans towards KG.
JB
(whispering)
KG, listen. A magical guitar pick.
KG looks incredulous but is intrigued, too.
CUT TO:
EXT. VENICE BEACH – NIGHT
JB and KG sit under the stars by a bonfire, discussing the possibility of stealing the pick.
KG
Are we really doing this JB? Stealing?
JB looks at KG, a fiery determination in his eyes.
JB
We’re not stealing, KG. We’re…borrowing.
KG hesitates, then breaks into a grin.
KG
Alright then. Let’s do this.
FADE OUT.
TO BE CONTINUED…
FADE IN:
Scene 4
INT. JB AND KG’S SHABBY APARTMENT – MORNING
JB sits on a worn-out SOFA, a crumpled MAP spread out in front of him, KG sprawled out beside him, eyes squinting at the map.
JB
OK, we know where the museum is.
KG leans back, a LOCK PICK in his hand.
KG
But do we know how to break in?
JB gestures dramatically towards a pile of BOOKS at the side.
JB
That’s why we have all these books on burglary and stuff.
KG glances at the books and chuckles.
KG
Right, because reading ‘The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Lock Picking’ will make us master thieves.
JB hits KG playfully.
JB
It’s better than your plan of rocking the doors down!
They both share a hearty LAUGH.
Suddenly, the mood changes. They look at each other, the gravity of their plan settling in.
KG
Do you really think we can do this, JB?
JB looks at KG, determination gleaming in his eyes.
JB
For Tenacious D, we’ll do whatever it takes.
CUT TO MONTAGE:
INT. APARTMENT – DAY
Quick shots of JB and KG practicing lock picking, dodging cardboard obstacles, studying the layout of the museum.
FADE OUT.
KG (V.O.)
But we have to remember, no matter how crazy it gets, we’re in this together.
FADE IN:
INT. APARTMENT – NIGHT
They sit exhausted but satisfied, their misadventures displayed in the chaos around them. The scene ends with them clinking their BEER CANS together, a silent promise to their impending adventure.
FADE OUT.
Scene 5
INT. JB AND KG’S APARTMENT – DAY
JB and KG are hunched over a road map spread out on the coffee table. They’re planning their adventure.
KG
(Laughs)
So, we’ll steal a car, drive to the museum, steal the pick, and become famous rock stars, just like that?
JB
(Smirks)
Exactly! C’mon, it’s destiny!
FADE TO:
EXT. HIGHWAY – DAY
A hilariously battered old van roars down the highway. The inside is packed with musical instruments. JB and KG jamming wildly as they drive.
EXT. DINER – DAY
They stop to eat. KG creates mayhem when he tries to flirt with the WAITRESS. JB has a laughing fit.
EXT. GAS STATION – NIGHT
JB accidentally fills the van with diesel instead of petrol. The van breaks down. They spend the night sleeping in the van, laughing at their misfortunes.
EXT. HIGHWAY – MORNING
They hitch a ride. The DRIVER is a huge, intimidating man with tattoos. JB and KG squeeze in, cracking jokes, trying to lighten the mood.
EXT. HIGHWAY – NIGHT
Police sirens wail. JB and KG abandon the stolen car and make a run for it, dodging police while making it an epic, comical chase sequence.
FADE TO:
EXT. FOREST – DAY
The duo takes a shortcut through a forest, getting lost, seeing strange wildlife and making up ridiculous songs about their journey.
FADE IN:
EXT. MUSEUM – NIGHT
JB and KG finally reach their destination, looking rough and worn out but still hilariously cheerful. They exchange a glance before venturing in.
NARRATOR (V.O.)
And thus begins the great heist.
